Animal Dismemberment Simulator Coming Soon
Posted on 05.11.07 by A 47 Danger @ 7:43 am

The Happy Tree Friends are coming to a game system near you this fall. Or, rather, a PC or Xbox 360 near you. In a game. Now push all those sentences together and you’ll understand what I meant.

This ultra violent video game that is sure to delight many internet fans will be called Happy Tree Friends False Alarm. And as fun as I hope it is, there’s nothing quite like nitpicking a press release. So let us continue in that manner.

Disaster levels made exclusively for Happy Tree Friends False Alarm: SEGA and the creative minds behind Happy Tree Friends have teamed up to create 10 original and engaging disaster scenarios such as the Mine Shaft, Candy Factory, and Museum.

Thank goodness they won’t be reusing those disaster levels from those other games with disaster levels. These will be exclusive. And engaging.

Gameplay true to the franchise: Experience the non-stop hilarious action Happy Tree Friends-style where their accident prone universe means destruction and mayhem are inevitable.

If the hilarity stops for one split second, they have a lawsuit on their hands. Oddly enough, even in our non-accident prone universe, destruction and mayhem are inevitable.

Okay, nothing more to make fun of. The game will use some sort of physics engine and, hopefully, the game play won’t suffer. I don’t wish the failure of videos games. I am always hopeful. Here is hoping for a quality Happy Tree Friends release!


Filed under: A 47 Danger and General and PC and Xbox 360
Comments: 1 Comment

That 80s Guitar Hero
Posted on 05.10.07 by A 47 Danger @ 10:02 am

Guitar Hero: Rocks the 80s is coming to a PS2 near you this…let’s see…let’s see. Hmmm, no release date. That’s weird.

Does the colon in the title seem misplaced to anyone else? No matter, I guess.

This Guitar Hero expansion will include 30 “awesome new songs.” Here are some of them:

  • I Wanna Rock (by Twisted Sister)
  • I Ran (by Flock of Seagulls)
  • Round and Round (as made famous by Ratt)
  • I Want Candy (as made famous by Bow Wow Wow)
  • Metal Health (as made famous by Quiet Riot)
  • Holy Diver (as made famous by Dio)
  • Heat Of The Moment (as made famous by Asia)

My heart isn’t with this release. I can’t get excited about 30 songs from the 80s. Now 40 songs from the 70s would be different, or 50 songs from the 60s. Or 100 songs from the 10s!


Filed under: A 47 Danger and General and PS2
Comments: 2 Comments

Articles by IM
Posted on 05.10.07 by A 47 Danger @ 9:31 am

Maxim: whats your fav game of the year?
A 47 Danger: Gears of War.
Maxim: there.. we just wrote an article


Filed under: A 47 Danger and IM and Maxim and Xbox 360
Comments: None

Bullet what?
Posted on 05.09.07 by skintari @ 12:11 pm

Bullet Witch! Here’s a game that was originally developed as a japanese game and recently ported to the U.S. The premise is you (a witch), with a gun that is just a tad bigger than your entire body, must defeat throngs of undead soldiers. Obviously, you can use your gun to kill them, or you can use “magic”. The reason I put magic in quotes is that it’s not like fireballs or lasers that you can shoot from your hands, it’s magic that you can use to push a car into a bad guy, or heal people, or put a wall in front of you to stop incoming bullets.

While not entirely helpful, there are basic points that you have to use your magic. For instance, when  you battle the tanks in the first level, you have the ability to rain down lightning. One aspect about this is when you go to your magic screen and select the lightning, you end up mysteriously moving backwards to actually use it. It took me about 4 tries before I was able to lock on to the tank as it kept putting me out of range.

Another downfall of this game is the enemy. The AI was stupid. That’s to say it nicely. They also tend to blend in with the background. What was nice during the game was that since I couldn’t see the enemies all the time, they would give themselves away by shooting directly into the ground. Thanks, bad guys! Another reason why it was hard to see the enemy was because the surroundings would always tend to be in your way. When running along a line of bushes, there should be no reason why you can’t see through them. I can’t tell you how many times I ran along a path of foliage only to turn a corner and run into an enemy either shooting into the ground or standing there as dumbfounded as I am.

Which leads me to my final point. The gun itself is slow and awkward. The aiming has to be directly on the enemy to inflict any damage, which, in itself, is difficult because the controls seem to move at different speeds. There are 2 aiming mechanisms. The first is traditional 3rd person and the second is a 1st person view. I found myself constantly “left-clicking” between the two, as it was hard to maneuver around the screen with one set viewpoint. Not to mention the enemies that would randomly pop up next to you during gameplay.

One last quick add is that there is no true jump. When trying to get over a car, ledge, random obstruction, you hit the left trigger to do some aerobic spinning and twisting before you actually go airborn. If I wanted my character to do that much exercise, I would have rented DDR.

Now, I know this is pretty negative for my first review, but there are some pluses for this game. You definitely don’t have to think too much and you can’t get lost as you’re on a set game path. Additionally, the lead character is easy on the eyes! But all that can’t take away from the poor quality of the game itself. This is one game that feels rushed and poorly put together. That’s a shame, cause the idea is pretty kickass.

My vote for this game is 2/5. Could be so much more if it spent a little more time in development tho.


Filed under: Review and Xbox 360 and skintari
Comments: None

Way I Play and the living dead
Posted on 05.09.07 by A 47 Danger @ 8:51 am

Welcome back to Way I Play! It’s been a little while, hasn’t it? Let’s bring you up to date on what happened.

One, my out of warranty Xbox 360 that has never been moved or jostled in any way since installation came up with the dreaded three light Ring of Death. This indicates hardware failure. So a little over a year, and my Xbox 360 breaks for no reason.

Two, with no Xbox 360, I didn’t feel like handing out hosting costs to the ever greedy GoDaddy establishment.

I think that was about it. Now you’re up to date. My Xbox 360 is still broken, and I turn it on every so often in the hopes that it made a mistake, but that doesn’t mean this blog should die.

So welcome back and stick around. We have a lot of complaining to do!


Filed under: A 47 Danger and General
Comments: None

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